izzy (screaming from the next room): aaghhhh!! mommy, hurry! there's a big spider on my leg.
me (running through the kitchen to grab a paper towel): i'm coming, baby!
izzy: oh hurry, please!! it hurts so bad!!!!!!!!!!!
me (arriving to see the nastiness on her lower leg but unable to get down to it because i'm holding a sick baby): quick, put your leg up here and let me get it off.
me: izzy, it's a dried cranberry.